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the child. princess of God. gospeliter. 10111991. hmss091011. npech. B0108091011. hiclub. fencer. guides. 12c30405. 34s20607. crescent. the younger days. July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 November 2010 the peers. charmaineng henrietta samantha YOUTH. youth a big message a big mission glcc bernice chiawen daphne giolo ian jessica jiahao jonmuk kennethchai lesley lynnshan malcolm markchia melody ruth sicheng B01 [08091011]. B01 [08091011] afifah amirahlee daphne jieling kaiting latifah michelleling pengswee rongxuan tammie weiqian yvonne yiting SYFC. estherhuang marcus ruixin sheena sheryl vanessa HMS.NP. keala fencing alicia chuhui darren fiona hidayah jasmine juian kayyong madalene matthewhan romaine ronny tecky wayne CRESCENT. guides eileen
the interactions. the thanks. Base code:OHsaygoodbye Image: sxc.hu |
28 August 2009 ! at 2:28 AM ! 19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. Such simple commands. So easy to understand, yet so hard to apply. So often, on the exterior, we appear okay. We seem to be listening, we seem to be very patient, never losing our temper. But what about on the inside? Is the heart still at peace? I used to think that it'll be okay just as long as I'll be patient and wait till the other person has finished speaking before I take my turn. & I thought that it'll be okay just as long as I control my temper & not let it out. But this doesn't seem to be the case. While I was patiently waiting for the other party to finish speaking, I was, at least, hearing. But listening? I'm not so sure. The words do enter through my ears, but they probably exit just as quick. I was merely waiting for my turn to speak. Slow to speak...? Often, I realised that I really want to just get my point across, without any considerations for the other party. As I listen, or hear, what the other party says, feelings of injustice surface and tempers start to flare. Yes, I do try to keep it in. But what happens if I can no longer restrain it? Do I then allow it to be let out? Can I keep it in? I don't think being slow to anger would mean just being gentle-tempered on the outside. Appearances are no more than deceiving acts. Besides, how long can one try to keep it in and continously try to be gentle-tempered? If the heart is at peace, wouldn't one not have to try to gentle-tempered? Not getting angry too quickly would then just come from the heart. O God, I do so want the righteous life that You desire for me. Yet, it seems like an unattainable goal. You said, with You, all things are possible. You said, You will never leave nor forsake me. & now I claim Your promises. Sometimes, I feel like a wreck, a mess. I need You to hold my hand & walk with me. Maybe it's really my fault. Maybe I was really too stubborn. This heart can be so deceitful, so prideful. Take it Lord, & create a new heart in me. I need a new lease of life, in You. <3, CASS. 21 August 2009 ! at 12:41 AM ! Today's Joyce Ho's birthday, finally got her number from Jiatru so I gave her a call. A few minutes into catching up with her, I cried. I've always thought that if I were to run into her, I'll be super excited but and I may be emotional. But I never thought talking to her on the phone can make me miss her that much too. So much that I cried! Well, I'm so glad I gave her a call, so glad we chatted, even if it was only for 25 minutes. So much's happened in her life, & mine as well. I could sense that we've both grown in our own ways, yet I'm glad I could still talk to her like an old friend! :D Happy 18th Birthday Joyce! Even though the days we spent together, like really together, was short, only 2 years, I treasured them a lot. I guess it's because our friendship back then was so pure, so true. Till today I still miss you tremendously & spending time with you. I still keep the disc you gave me when we parted after Sec 2! Well, Joyce, if you ever read this, please do make a date with me! Although we're in different schools, different courses etc etc, but well, I hope we still can go out together more regularly! Love you! (: ITBD tomorrow! I need wisdom from God! (: Kaiting & I are giving each other ITBD revision on MSN! Haha, it's been ages since I did such things. I think the last time was 'O' levels period! Camped at Woodlands library today with Jelly. Seriously, the air conditioning was like, free of charge or something! It was freezing cold! It was a pretty productive time I suppose... Haha, though my hands and fingers are aching from all that note-making! By the way, coronets make absolutely delectable treats, especially if you've been studying the whole day! PS. It's from Ichiban Sushi :D Love the simplicities of life at times <3 <3, CASS. 20 August 2009 ! at 3:34 AM ! I mean, I know I'm not a fantastic-hotel-chef-kind-of-cook, but I've always thought I could cook Maggie noodles at least. I've been cooking outdoors in Guides! (Oh mann, I really miss outdoor cooking!) In any case, on Monday, I tried to cook lunch for myself 'cause I was too tired to go out and study. So I started boiling water and cooking Maggie noodles. Instead of boiling hard boiled eggs as usual, I decided to try to scramble it. So I beat the eggs in another bowl and waited for the noodles to cook in the boiling water. After a while (I think I put in too much water 'cause it kept spilling over :/), I reckon the noodles was cooked. It was boiling hot. And smart me tried to drain it 'cause it's supposed to be dry mee. I had no absolute idea how to drain it. I just took the entire pot to the sink and started trying to pour all the water out. Eventually, I somehow managed to pour the noodles onto the sink. All of it -.- Oh wells. So I frantically started scooping the noodles back into my bowl, hoping to salvage my lunch. & for fear of hygiene, I ran it under the tap water. So my noodles turned soggy. ): That's not all. After which, I decided to save on pots & pans by scrambling my eggs in the pot. So I took the seasoning oil for my Maggie noodles and poured it into the pot and heat is up. After which I poured my eggs in. To my horror, only the bottom cooked! I panicked and started mixing up the eggs so the whole thing would be cooked. It ended up looking like mash eggs :/ & it left the pot with a brown burnt layer :/// My mum, was of course, furious with me :/// Well. I've decided to lay my hands off cooking for now. Until someone's willing to teach me step by step & not let me venture in & turn cooking into a guess-the-steps game. Or, I'll just let/wait for others (like my sister) to cook for me ;D <3, CASS. 17 August 2009 ! at 1:28 AM ! & as my parents talked, my sisters talked, I sat by the side of the cab. All silent, blasting the music in my ears. Yet, amazingly, I couldn't take in a single lyric from whatever song was playing on my iTouch. My thoughts were still louder. The questions swirled around, and different situations popped up idly every now and then. I walked along the farmiliar corridor that led to his door, behind my mum & sisters. I didn't quite reach as fast, so all I saw initially was them whispering outside his gate. A wave of shock, a stare of disbelief when I reached his gate. He was, honestly, a bag of bones. I cringed at the sight of him. I barely just met him a couple of months back, and I never noticed, never realized. He was walking, limping rather, around topless as usual in his house. I could see pieces of skin hanging loosely from his torso, his arms and shoulders bony and thin. He looked so brittle, so fragile. & then I saw his legs. They were swollen. We entered his house & made him sit down so we could look at his legs. His right leg was red, bloody, and painful to look at. I didn't know what to say. My eyes glistened for a moment, but I stopped it. I had to look away. My heart ached at the sight of the failing old man before me. In my memories, he used to be so healthy, so strong. I loved him. I did, & I still do. Maybe that's why it hurt even more. Ached more like it. He was unwilling to go to the doctor's again. I wanted so much to just cry and beg him. To tell him not to be stubborn & to just try to stay alive. But I think it's more than just that. I think he has lost his purpose in life. There's nothing for him to look forward to each day. Insisting on living on his own in his house, none of my uncles or auntie could force him to move out. He wakes up each day, only to sit around the same seats in the house, waiting to pass time, for nightfall to come before he'll go to bed once more. Perhaps that's why he's so stubborn. He'll skip medication, refuse to tell anyone when he's injured, refuse to seek medical help, refuse to allow anyone to hire a private nurse for him. Everyone's so frustrated with him. I think, they've given up hope on him. I hear the frustration in their voice, the impatience in their tones when they speak to him. There's the unwillingness to take him out, the exasperation at his stubbornness. It's already been quite a while. But I can't give up hope on him, can I? Though I don't know how to ever help him see the purpose of life, I can only pray that God will change his heart. Growing old suddenly seems so ugly. I miss the old younger you. <3, CASS. 13 August 2009 ! at 12:51 AM ! It's not that I haven't had time... I've had pockets of time here and there. Especially since all the projects are over and done with. But, suddenly, blogging seems so... Public. I mean, I've always known that it's public since I don't lock my blog. But, maybe, it's just I feel a need to be private. Private space? I don't really feel like blogging much anymore. Let's hope it's not insecurity. <3, CASS. |