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the child. princess of God. gospeliter. 10111991. fencer. 1B010809. npech. guides. 12c30405. 34s20607. crescent. the younger days. July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 the peers. charmaineng henrietta samantha YOUTH. youth bernice chiawen daphne giolo jessica jiahao jonmuk kennethchai lesley lynnshan malcolm melody sicheng B01 [08091011]. B01 [08091011] afifah amirahlee daphne jieling kaiting latifah michelleling pengswee tammie weiqian yvonne yiting SYFC. estherhuang marcus ruixin sheena sheryl vanessa HMS.NP.FENCING. keala fencing alicia chuhui darren hidayah juian kayyong matthewhan romaine tecky wayne CRESCENT. guides eileen
the interactions. the thanks. Base code:OHsaygoodbye Image: sxc.hu |
20 June 2009 ! at 12:09 PM ! Anyway. I'm so proud to say that I've survived through week 7 of school. It was pure craziness, with only 8 hours of sleep from that Monday to Wednesday, 2 whole nights without sleep - Tuesday & Thursday. I conked out on Friday night. I had a million and one things to do during that week! D: How I pulled through I had no absolute idea as well. Okay I have one. I know it was really by His grace! On Thursday night, or should I say, Friday morning? Anyway, in the wee hours of that day, as I was assembling and turning juice cartons into car models, I heard the song, 祷告. Oh how it touched my heart. It just broke me down, spoke right through to my heart. I knew what I needed to do. I needed to 祷告, to just pray. Spend some time with Him, Whom I've been neglecting so often. 祷告 因为我渺小 祷告 因为我知道我需要 明瞭 你心意对我重要 祷告 已假装不了 祷告 因为你的爱我需要 你关怀 我走过的你都明白 有些事我只想要对你说 因你比任何人都爱我 痛苦从眼中流下 你知道你为我擦 在早晨我也要来对你说 主耶稣今天我为你活 所需要的力量你天天赐给我 你恩典够我用 Week 8 was slightly better. But I had 3 essays due. Which almost killed me. But this time round, I think, I've been depending more on God & less on my own strength. It's such an irony, that it's only when we suffer, when we have to undergo trials, when we are totally worn out & pushed right down to the bottom of our own valley that we turn our eyes upwards to look upon Him. Otherwise, our eyes turn everywhere but upwards. We just see how we just keep going down, how everything keeps pushing us to the rock bottom. Yet, it's only when we've been fully stretched, fully tested, then do we turn back to praise Him. While we keep thinking that we're plunging downwards, we fail to notice the cushion He has already set in place for us. <3, CASS. 05 June 2009 ! at 5:55 AM ! 祷告 因为我渺小 祷告 因为我知道我需要 明瞭 你心意对我重要 祷告 已假装不了 祷告 因为你的爱我需要 你关怀 我走过的你都明白 有些事我只想要对你说 因你比任何人都爱我 痛苦从眼中流下 你知道你为我擦 在早晨我也要来对你说 主耶稣今天我为你活 所需要的力量你天天赐给我 你恩典够我用 我真的假装不了, 真的真的需要回到你的身边. I miss QTs. It's been almost, 2 weeks now, since I last did QT. <3, CASS. 23 May 2009 ! at 9:25 PM ! Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, it doesn't mean that they don't love you with all that they have. (Tan, 2009) It's true, & it reminds me of the 5 different love languages that we all have. Germ, Cel, Sam & my mum are all quality time people, Hen's a gift girl, while Lyana & I are both words of affirmation lovers :D Gotta go find out Charm's & Rach's. & the rest of my friends! "So much held in a heart in a lifetime. So much held in a heart in a day, an hour, a moment. We are utterly open with no one, in the end -- not mother and father, not wife or husband, not lover, not child, not friend. We open windows to each but we live alone in the house of the heart. Perhaps we must. Perhaps we could not bear to be so naked, for fear of a constantly harrowed heart. When young we think there will come one person who will savor and sustain us always; when we are older we know this is the dream of a child, that all hearts finally are bruised and scarred, scored and torn, repaired by time and will, patched by force of character, yet fragile and rickety forevermore, no matter how ferocious the defense and how many bricks you bring to the wall. You can brick up your heart as stout and tight and hard and cold and impregnable as you possibly can and down it comes in an instant, felled by a woman's second glance, a child's apple breath, the shatter of glass in the road, the words I have something to tell you, a cat with a broken spine dragging itself into the forest to die, the brush of your mother's papery ancient hand in a thicket of your hair, the memory of your father's voice early in the morning echoing from the kitchen where he is making pancakes for his children." -- Brian Doyle (Tan, 2009) Reference List: Tan, J.L. (2009). MSN Conversation & Email. Singapore: Cassandra's computer screen. Okay I have no absolute idea how to reference an online source thus I'm using the book one. ALL JIANG LING'S FAULT LAH. Hahaha want me to reference her! -.- <3, CASS. 19 May 2009 ! at 1:02 AM ! I miss that show. Although it leaves me drained of what feels like 10 litres of tears, I still love it very very very much. It talks about a young teenage girl, one who's smart and full of dreams, who encounters this muscular degenerating disease, and how she fought her way to live. The very first time I watched it, I started crying from Episode 1 all the way to the ending. Every single episode I just had to cry. At the end of it all, when I finally finished, my mum commented the very next day that my eyes were at their puffiest yet. & they were ultra red. Although the show is extremely sad, it is also very inspiring. She even had to fight just to stay alive. She was always so cheerful, so optimistic. So full of love and gentleness to the people around her, so willing to sacrifice herself for others. How can I not cry? Watching how she fought to stay in her dream school and how she slowly learns that she has to give up on things that she love, like baskbetball and sports, it was definitely... Reflective. Sometimes in life, all of us take things for granted. Simple things like health, we've never really appreciated its value. It's just something that we always thought that it'll be there, yet we don't realize it till we lose it. I pray, dear God, that You'll teach & remind me to constantly value the simple things and luxury of life that I have. My air con broke down recently. ALL 3. My entire house is extremely warm & humid. Everyone's dying/melting lah please!!! Haha. But at least tonight's not as bad as last night's. I practically couldn't sleep last night lah. Kept waking up in perspiration every 2 hours :/// Thus I was late this morning for school D: Ah. I think this coming week's gonna be real packed. Alee & I were talking about Spanish names! Alicia's a Spanish name! D: So cool, I want one too! I don't mind Alita, I think it's pretty cool & cute! :D That's what I'm gonna name my daughter in future if I get one! OHOHOH. http://www.behindthename.com/php/view.php?name=cassandra Meaning of Cassandra! :D Ohoh. & I remembered that the Macmilian (SP?) Dictionary that we used in Secondary school had my name in it! COOL HUH! ;D Anyway. The camp over the weekend was... Okay lah eventually. Although I still think that it was quite a waste of time D: Haha. I only liked the Profiling part 'cause it was ultra cool. & a couple of suggested occupations for me were child care worker & counselor! Anyway, I'm an ENFJ. Haha it was on one of my previous posts, 'cause Marcus asked me to do. Haha! I entered the right field :D Haha. Hmm, the hold-candles-&-walk-for-very-long night walk was okay lah. I started talking to BS & I found out that she's involved in CIP with kids! So cool lah, so I signed up with her, & asked her to include me in future activities so that I can join if I'm free :D Although I don't know when I will be. HAHA. Oh then I liked the car-making part, it was quite cool, quite fun 'cause we all started to warm up a little more to each other & started working together. So not bad lah, but I highly doubt I formed any lasting friendships with any of them. It's like, a little weird seeing as how we might/most likely never work together anymore lah. HAHA. Nice to know a couple of new friends anyway. Okay. I wanna go sleep already. & I've got to get Samantha to stop watching 1 litre of tears soon. Otherwise I won't be able to sleep & I'll just watch on with her & cry! D: <3, CASS. 14 May 2009 ! at 1:39 AM ! In a normal typical day, how many times do we actually remember God? How often do we speak to Him, how often do we even think about our identity as Christians? A couple of times, perhaps. Meal times when we say grace. But, once again, has saying grace becomes something out of a habit or do we really mean it when we thank Him for once again providing us with food that many unfortunate others out there don't have? And just that few, spare moments with Him, is our relationship with Him even scarcely there? Maybe, I should use I instead. Is my relationship with Him just a 'touch and go' kinda relationship? Oh no, I hope not. Dear God please draw me back to You. Remind me constantly of my purpose in all that I do, that I do out of devotion, and not out of duty. & that of course, I'll place You above all else. I should be sleeping. Early class tomorrow. & PEP20 tomorrow. Had HMSS Exco meeting just now - Next post yeah? Eyelids are getting heavy already. Just had to jot down my sudden thoughts & reflections before i forget them. I've got S (x infinity) TM. D: <3, CASS. |